But don’t sacrifice yourself in the process….
I wished I could have put the whole title in the headline, but I thought it would maybe be more attractive to the reader (as in you, yes you, reading this post) if I didn’t. Who reading this is an over-doer? A high expectation, I will accomplish it, multi-tasking with my many versions of myself running every direction known to man kind of gal?
I, at times have tried to be this kind of woman. I say try because honestly, I’m learning it isn’t actually possible. As high achievers, we think it’s totally possible, and at times we have even temporarily succeeded biting off more than we can chew, however, and I say however, it doesn’t come without a cost.
Real life truth: I have suffered from anxiety and depression for most of my twenties. I think my first panic attack came in college. And honestly, lately, I have had a lot of anxiety. I have days where I feel like I can conquer the world, feeling so capable of anything, having my shit together, crossing off my to do list like a boss and manage running my businesses and household, and personally hobbies like a champ. And then there are days, I don’t even want to get out of bed, and I have to use every ounce of energy I feel like I have to make myself get up and get busy. I am only sharing with you because I know I am not the only one who is trapped in this repeated cycle of life.
Okay, bare with me sister, this blog is all about motivating you to be the best you can be, but we won’t succeed being the best versions of ourselves, if we constantly throw ourselves to the wolves, overdoing, and saying yes to things we know we just really cannot get done or done well in a given moment.
To be the best version of yourself, this realization part of the process, and it takes figuring out what is REALLY, no if, and’s or butts about it important to you. Then after you narrow down that list, you can shape your life and be purposeful in your actions to accomplish those goals. But more on that later, this post isn’t about figuring it out. This post is about that valley of a moment when you have a low point and just can’t seem to get it together.
I recently had a knock down drag out full blown anxiety attack. It was on the way to a work meeting that I thought started at 10 am, that really started at 9 am, and was atleast a 2.5 hour drive for me. It wasn’t really that I was going to be an hour late that bothered me, in my new mom life, being a few minutes late is the new normal for me, and is something I am constantly working on improving, but it was the event that happened to basically be the last straw before the camel’s back went splat.
That particular day, I just lost it. It was like I just couldn’t catch up. I couldn’t answer to all the demands of the day. I was truly ready to quit my job and just give up trying to be a career oriented mom. Yep. I’m being honest and transparent here.
I didn’t quit my job. But I did realize something needed to change for me to be able to handle the demands of my career, my mental health, my mom life, and my wife life.
Luckily, I had already had a trip planned for a mental self-growth and self-care built in weekend that weekend and it couldn’t have come at a better time. And I will happily say, I’m on the mend. But my point here is, why do we wait until we break for life to come unraveled for us to see we need to cut ourselves some slack and we finally realize we have too much on our plate? What is it that we feel we have to just always hold it all together? Never falter, and never fail.
News flash: Life doesn’t occur without failure. Trial and error. Oops moments. Over the self growth weekend, I realized: an empty cup can’t fill other cups. Seems cliche but it is the truth. If we are running on empty how do we think we can suddenly jump start everyone else? It’s a sick trap I see so many people get stuck in, including myself, so no judgment here friends. But I’m hoping that by getting you thinking about it you are able to be more self aware and tell your self to “hold up girlfriend” before you come spiraling apart.
In a world where we have unlimited resources to accomplish the daily tasks of living, we fail at one important one: self care. We fail at taking care of ourselves! What? This is ludicrous to me. But I do it to myself all the time.
I am all about being a find a way, make a way type of gal–in everything I set my mind to. But here’s the twist, let’s be a find a way, make of way type of gal on the journey to self love, and self care. I challenge you to make some time for yourself every week, shoot, every day would be ideal, to totally just focus on you and your wants and needs: go for a walk, ride your horse, write, just do something that you want, take a shower, take a nap, girl, the possibilities are endless!
It is there, we find the peace and the will to move forward into the life we always dreamt of living.
XOXO,
Hannah
Ranch life, Ranch wife: a real, unfiltered slice of a working mom's life 